I always like to use these two little “tests” in my head to decide whether someone is marriage material or not – not that I’ve met many people who could tick these boxes. I usually tell my friends this “little trick” when we’re discussing the opposite sex. It generally pisses them off when they realise their girlfriend (who I don’t like) doesn’t make the cut.
I have a friend who I will not name (let’s call him ‘Mike’) that insists that he’s going to have to cheat on his girlfriend eventually, although he “loves her” and would never want to date anyone else.
He acts like he has no choice, and that it would be selfish of him if he ever let her find out (ie got caught) because it would hurt her feelings. This self-rationalising justification is gross, and tbh I’ve lost a lot of respect for the guy. He’s of weak moral character and it shows. My ex used to say he was a “loser”.
But we delve into the reasons and rationale behind what’s going on, and how you can avoid becoming like ‘Mike’.
There are two main tests to figuring out if this person is right for you. The first test’s credit goes to Waitbutwhy.com
1. The Personality “Traffic” Test
If you had to drive them home after a date, would you be hoping there’s more traffic on the way because you want to spend more time talking? – Are the conversations you have that good and exciting? If the answer is a resounding ‘yes’, move on to test number two:
2. The Attractiveness Test
How do you know if the person is of a physical standard that you’re happy with? In other words, where should you base your standard on how ‘hot’ your life partner should be? Well, ask yourself a simple question. Is the sexual chemistry and attraction you feel to the other person good enough that you would immediatley be willing to bet that you’d be happy to have sex with this person, and ONLY this person and no one else for the rest of your life?
If the answer to these two above questions is yes, you might have just found yourself an outlier.